The little devil on your shoulder

So, I made it back to PA after spending fourteen hours driving (starting at three Friday morning) and twenty-four hours back home.

Happily (more or less), the funeral was without incident (as with many families, this is no guarantee in mine). Everyone who came was wonderful and supportive to my mother, which was really all I could have asked for.

Tomorrow is another early start (4:30am) to get to the race in Erie. Due to... well everything that's been happening, I haven't been able to run since Monday. Hopefully I was enough in shape for the thirteen miles on no sleep tomorrow.

My tummy is a little upset just thinking about it. (Unlike most runners, I can't eat or drink while I race without puking in the bushes. I just take a sip of water here and there to keep my mouth from drying out, then guzzle at the end of the race. This is one reason I've never attempted a full marathon.)

Hopefully, I will still be awake enough afterwards to go visit ignipes!

~

In other news, just got Jane Eyre from Netflix. It was so good! I've been rereading the story. I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed it back in middle/high school. And Fassy was awesome, of course.

Okay. To bed for me.

A friend and I went on a pleasant 10.5 mile run this morning (the same loop ignipes and I did last spring) where I'm going to run the half-marathon next week. It was like a course-preview/review, and it went really well.

~

I scrubbed all the carpets of pet-residue on my hands and knees this afternoon. If only my landlord could see them now.

And when I buy my first place, it will have nary a carpet (unless it's one destined to be removed), I SWEAR.

~

Um, I was thinking that if I ever had kids. Which I am totally not thinking about. I'd have twin boys.

I also think this thought makes me officially crazy.

~

I got A Solitary Man from Netflix the other night, and I can't get it out of my head. Fandom, WHY did you not tell me Nicholas Hoult was the younger/gay love interest in a Colin Firth film? Or that both he and Colin were AWESOMESAUCE. This is one of my new favorite movies, in the category of favorite movies where American Beauty lies.

( Just. Look. )

~

True Blood finale: HOLY SHIT, WTF!?!

That is all I have to say for now. Or without spoiler tags.

Went to NYC for Labor Day weekend, and it was FABULOUS! (Could it not be? The city clears out for the weekend, so there is even actual parking to be found)

Saw Anything Goes on Broadway. Since my parents subscribe and were able to get the tickets before the Tony nominations were out, we were 3rd row center. WHAT a fun show! I was in a lot of these numbers in high school, and it was so glorious to see them properly dones, although I had to fight not to sing along.

( clips from the show )

Spent an afternoon at the Met, a day waling around Central Park (and rode the Carousel, which I haven't done since I was about six), met several friends, had great Tapas and Sushi (not all at once), went on my long run (11mi) in prep for next week's half marathon, and just generally enjoyed it.

Then I came home.

Oy, if I am living here in three years' time, someone please slap me upside the head. I feel so much more ALIVE being where things are happening, where not everyone is a WASP, where... I don't even know. Living out here is a pale imitation of the real thing--not that I mind rural life, but the kind of rural that exists out here is also backwards, and I want forwards-rural-with-more-city-access. Um. I kinda want it all.

I'm thinking Massachusetts?

Ugh. So.

I had a really nice time with The New Guy last night. It's... I'm usually not the one who cares more in any particular relationship, but in this one, there's a serious risk that I might be.

I'm not particularly upset about that part. As long as I go into it eyes open.

I am a little interested in the fact that I can't just let myself go. I had a great time, like a butterflies-shakey-knees-first-kiss-don't-stop good time. And we were supposed to see each other again tonight, but I chickened out and played tired. To be fair, so did he. I am going to NYC for the weekend (in an aside: CAn't BLOODY WAIT) so we won't be able to get together 'til Monday. Now, normally, this would be A-OKay, but in this case, it seems like a really really long time. And I can't tell if I chickened out tonight because I'm afraid, or because I'm so fully attached to the placeholder of a life I've built for myself in lieu of being with someone else, or, I don't even know.

God, I don't even know what I'm doing. I feel like I'm back in high school.

And I'm not even, really, all that upset about it.

~

In more important news, I really enjoyed this week's suits.

It's odd, but after a week/weekend on-call, Monday is the greatest word.

Last weekend was a bit rough (as anyone who caught my Saturday night post can attest). I worked a normal half-day Saturday, back home around two, then pretty much straight through from four pm to four am. I also killed (euthanized) the vast majority of my patients. That, after a busy Friday night, left me on my last nerve. Luckily, I only had one major call on Sunday night. Luckily it was a horse (I have infinite patience for horses relative to other animals). Then after work this evening, I was off!

Oh. Except for when my neighbor brought me a dying kitten to take care of, after her son motored over it in his PowerWheels car. I kid you not.

This is actually my life. *facepalm*

(I took the kitten to euthanize. Because I really am doctor death. I told her to tell her son we tried CPR to revive it. I am a lying liar.)

~

I spoke to my boss last week about what her plans were for my colleague's maternity leave. Um. The plan was to have me and her husband split on-call duty 50/50 for six weeks. I'll be paid more for the time, but I'm not sure money is worth the basket case I know I'll be (we currently split emergency duty three ways, and that seems like too much many days. See: last Saturday for example).

I suggested as much to her. I guess we'll see what happens...

~

I started dating someon new. I think I really like him, you guys!

That hasn't happened in, no joke, like ten years.

I guess, worst case scenario, at least I know I still have a heart? But best case scenario, I also get to have some fun. :)

~

I think that's all. I really want to finish one of the open stories on my desktop. The Charles/Erik one is proceeding in a slow, linear fashion. I think it's funny how each story develops so differently because the Hank/Alex one is written beginning to end, but each time I go through it I add new layers of characters and voice and... I don't know, but I'm rather enjoying the (also slow) process.

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CLARE: It's hard being left behind.

Okay, here's m feeling fannish.

1. The Fandom Relationship meme, gakked from seimaisin. ( This is always a fun one )

2. I'd really like to write some short XMFC fic. Everything I've started lately turns long and plotty. Sugest something short and sweet? Charles/Erik, Alex/Hank, Alex/Darwin, Raven or Emma. Or else I'll just go cruise the kinkmeme for a bit (Umm. That sounds dirtier than it was supposed to be).

3. And from thistlerose: Give me a character that I've written about from any of my fandoms, and I’ll give you one reason for liking (or disliking!) the character, two favorite ships, three favorite friendships, and four pieces of headcanon.

So I kinda sorta fixed my computer. I used about two tubes of crazy glue to reattach the casing, fill the places the plastic cracked, and get it back in one piece.

It stays open just fine. I can probably close it in a pinch (no more traveling with the laptop, alas). But it'll hold up until I can afford a new one (3-5 months, I'm thinking). So that's good!

AND I can keep the TV!

~

It's been pouring this weekend, which is probably why, despite a disconcertingly busy Friday, the rest of the weekend has been pretty quiet on emergency. I still want to send out resumes. I dunno. We'll see if I can arrange a job where I get to have some kind of life.

~

Off to finish some cooking!

My computer screen casing busted this morning-- now I can't close the laptop without horrible grinding of plastic parts.

I guess after four years, it doesn't owe me any favors. I was kinda hoping to get another year out of it, though.

Unfortunately, probably going to have to return the new TV if I need to replace my computer instead.